People who never return my emails can just DIAF.

Drat

Movie popcorn, with all of its butter (I know it’s actually butter-flavored oil, because my friend Elizabeth, who used to work at the movies, always calls it oil, but I’d like to pretend that it’s butter) has ruined me for regular popcorn out of the microwave. And I can’t bring myself to add butter to this stuff when I know how not good for me it already is, so now I’m stuck eating dry, dissatisfying popcorn. Oy.

The only saving grace is that my microwave’s popcorn setting somehow sucks, and managed not to pop a good quarter of the kernels, so at least I’m eating less crappy popcorn than I could be…