Jeez

Things I do not understand:

How could this kid have scammed so many prestigious universities and organizations? Why is it that only the Rhodes Scholarship people figured out what a bunch of BS all this was? And why did he keep doing it even after he got caught? (via Metafilter)

Also, if we ever perfect time machines, an early-20s Jake Gyllenhaal would have to be my first choice to play Young Mr. Wheeler.

Please stop laughing

Sadly enough, this article is real, and not something thought up by the good folks over at The Onion. That’s right, folks: more Liberty University/evolution class silliness, this time brought to you by the Washington Post. Because it wasn’t embarrassing enough when the local Lynchburg paper was doing the reporting. Professor DeWitt, from the earlier article, takes his Advanced Creation Studies class to the Smithsonian, and complains how only one side is presented. Please explain to me how advanced any theory can be that essentially boils down to “A wizard did it.” If I went to Liberty, though, I would definitely take that series of classes. Sounds like an easy A for sure, as long as the words creator, infinite wisdowm, and divine plan figure prominently in all responses to essay questions. The Washington Post article’s subtitle makes me so sad: Creationist Students Take Field Trip to Hotbed of Evolution: The Smithsonian. When your real life would make a suitably humorous Onion headline, it might be time to reevaluate the road that led you to that point.

Read all instructions before writing anything

Did you ever take that test in school, where the teacher told you to read every instruction before writing anything? My eighth grade social studies teacher gave that one to us, and I was reading the whole thing and getting nervous, because while I was fretting about coming back to the seemingly-difficult math question at the top, I noticed that people in the class were already writing. And then, when I got to the end of the 20 questions, I read: “Write only your name at the top of the paper. Do not answer any other question.” I felt much better, and was silently laughing all all the yahoos who’d started to answer the hard questions above without ever reading that they need only write their name to complete the test.

Well, today I’m that yahoo. I received an email from a coworker. I usually ignore everything that she sends me, because they’re usually about jobs, and I already have one (I get creeped out by somebody I work with constantly trying to push me to get another job, although she seems to think I’m really smart and swears that she just thinks I could do better), but this one I actually read. It was about the Corporate Fellowship at Wake Forest U’s Babcock School, in which minority students can receive an MBA free (plus expenses are paid). It sounded good, so I read the brochure attached in the email, thought it still seemed pretty sweet, and then started my application.

I rounded up my GRE scores (kept in the same box as a bunch of casserole recipes and a Great Adventure ticket good for the entire 2007 season), spent most of today sprucing up my resume, and then prepared to write the essays required. I didn’t get to them yet, but went back to the Babcock School web site to get inspiration. I decided to read more about the Fellowship, and that’s when I read that it is open only to those who have graduated from college within the last 12 months. I finished undergrad in 2003, and finished my master’s in 2006, so I definitely don’t qualify in that respect.

I emailed one of the program directors to see if the lack of applicants would allow them to overlook my extreme oldness, and consider my application anyway, since I meet every other qualification. I am still waiting to hear back from her, but I’m not hopeful. If I’d only thought to read that page before I started my application, I never would have gone further, and wouldn’t have cared. Well, at least my resume looks pretty great now.

Things that do not surprise me

I haven’t lived in Lynchburg, VA for six years (man, the years have flown by!), but I haven’t forgotten what it was like to live there, either. Every now and then I catch up with what’s going on there by visiting the web site of the News and Advance, the local newspaper. I was saddened, but in no way surprised to see this article about Liberty University’s position on evolution (hint: not favorable towards). I know a lot of people who I respect and think the world of who do not believe in evolution either (we agree to disagree), but I think that a whole institute of learning should probably know better than to endorse an untestable, untried, unprovable theory based on the an account written when people still believed that offering sacrifices of animals, vegetables, and PEOPLE could appease the gods.
My kind of alma mater, Randolph College, comes out looking infinitely more reasonable here.