Category: Philadelphia

Some more Philly

So Philly’s mayor, Mike Nutter, somehow knows the words to Rapper’s Delight, which is not an easy song to rap. Also, he’s not afraid to tell people not to be assholes!

Factor in the number of Wawas within its city limits, and Philadelphia is looking better and better all the time.

The greatest thing ever

This guy‘s two nights in Miami are just like The Hangover. Except without friends, Mike Tyson, an ill-advised marriage, or a pissed-off tiger. Also unlike that movie (I haven’t seen the second one, so let’s just pretend it doesn’t exist), the roofied shenanigans of famous-in-Philly meteorologist John Bolaris had actual consequences. AmEx ruined his credit, but then had to pay him damages; let’s put this one in the “Good” column. His job first suspended him, and then went ahead and fired him all the way; that would go in the “Not Good” column. This table is further developed below.

While this story added nothing to my life and just reminded me that I’m an awful person who will laugh at anything, I am grateful that I read this article, if only for the following words: “In Philly, weathermen and chefs are stars. John has been a huge star in Philly for years.” Sixth borough (are people still trying to make that one happen?), I love you so.

GoodNot Good
AmEx paid him damagesAfter they'd refused to reverse the roofie charges and ruined his credit score.
He had the possibility of getting laidHe was roofied instead by beautiful women who made him buy expensive stuff
He awaked the next day alive and okayHe went out with the roofiers again, because they were still beautiful women
He cares enough about meteorology that he gave the forecast over his Twitter account when he was suspendedIt's a good thing that he finds intrinsic satisfaction in his job, because he was first suspended, and then fired, and no longer receives money for doing it.
He apparently had no idea that his credit card could send him text alerts about what is happening on his account
He apparently values the potential for sex more than he does his own welfare.

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