Who would want this?

I asked Satanski what he wanted me to bring him back from the zoo, but he said he didn’t know. I suspect that he just wanted to get off the phone; I think I called during SuperWhy. Anyway, I tried a different tack, and asked him which animal he liked the best. Naturally, because he’s angry and scary, he said tigers. With that in mind, I searched the zoo’s gift shop until I found a really adorable pair of tiger slippers. The only problem was that they were not labeled with a size, so I had to guess about whether they’d fit him. (Question I was asked, “How do you know what size shoe he wears?” I was temped, but somehow resisted saying “Voodoo,” although the truth “I’ve bought his last few pairs of sneakers” wasn’t as interesting.)

Sadly enough, although I’d bought the only small-kid size they had, the slippers were still too small for my kiddo. I also got him a wallet when we went to SeaWorld, but I still really like the idea of tiger slippers, so I went online looking for them. I’ve just started, so I’m not exactly  discouraged, but I haven’t been able to find any Satanski-sized pairs yet. What I did find was this scary freakshow of a pair.

I have no idea why any adult would buy those slippers, or any child would want them (but here’s the link for all you nutjobs out there). I cannot imagine sticking my feet in those things without worrying that I would pull back stumps.