Do NOT mess with the cheerleader

It’s amazing enough that a 16 year old girl was able to tackle and subdue a shoplifter, but the fact that she did it in a strapless dress is, to me, by far the craziest part of this story.

You shouldn’t be able to wear Louboutins until you can legally drink

I think it’s pretty hilarious and awesome that Selena Gomez (who?) wouldn’t take off her high heels when my favorite building-exiter ever, Justin Bieber, asked her to, but my rah rah girlpower mood was kind of killed when I realized that she’s wearing ~$700 shoes in the accompanying picture. I’m not wishing an excess of teenage angst or even acne on the kid, but seriously? Let the grown-ups handle the designer footwear, kiddo.

Who is breeding with these people?

For the last time, people (and by people, I mean men), put down the babies before you lunge for foul balls. Thanks.

I knew I should have gone to Comic-Con

I feel that my friends on the West Coast have an unfair advantage when it comes to awesome conventions. They get the real Comic-Con (not the knock-off NYC version)  and WonderCon, which a friend who has attended tells me is awesome. I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about my coast’s crap luck when it comes to conventions, but I do feel minor pangs of sadness when I hear about conventions that I would have attended if it had been geographically feasible. This past weekend, I read several items about this year’s Comic-Con and felt a little sad. Until I saw this article, and then I felt a lot sadder.

Pacey-Con??? I know that this is all for a Funny or Die skit, but the premise still pretty hilarious. I’m envious of California people, again.

I didn’t realize that the plague, AKA black death, was still around (in this country? I’m pretty sure I knew it still existed in general). A lot of people, myself included, use the phrase “I had the plague,” to express a particularly unpleasant illness, but I’ve personally never meant that I had the actual plague. I think that everybody knows this, but I’ll apologize now if I’ve just rocked your world.

Scarily enough, rodents can carry and transmit the plague, a fact that I’m going to remember everytime I see those cute chipmunks that burrow near my house, despite the fact that most US plague cases are reported in the Western states. Can’t wait to avoid all rodents when I get to California in October!

Gross gross gross gross gross.

Once again, I am accidentally ahead of the curve

NPR says that libraries may be the next big thing ala cupcakes, which is awesome, except that the next big thing eventually turns into something old and played out. I’d like for libraries to be the next big thing ala flip-flops, which have existed in one form or another for hundreds of years. Despite their lengthy history, it has only been in the last decade and a half that flip-flops came on the scene in the US as acceptable public, adult footwear. Given their ubiquity, despite how bad they are for the feet, I doubt that they’ll be going anywhere anytime soon.

So, while I thank NPR for encouraging people to think about libraries, I don’t want readers to equate these amazing institutions with cupcakes. Cupcakes can be great, no doubt, but they can also be generic and ridiculously expensive, and as a trend cupcakes are dangerously close to overexposure. Instead, when you think of libraries, think of flip-flops: easy to find, accessible to all, and inexpensive to use. But not detrimental to your arches.

Maid ≠ Dude

I’m really amused by this story, largely because of the ultra-serious headline.

Sometimes it pays to have bad taste

This unattractive King James pendant, which a LeBron James fan bought at a yard sale for $5.00, is actually worth $10,000. Do you feel sick now? I know I do.

I hear that yard sales are fun, I’m going to start attending them. My plan is to stick closely to the costume jewelry section.

Update: Was the pendant stolen?

If I were a famous singer, I’d do this all the time

Good on Funny or Die for coming up with this video, which was pretty entertaining. Jewel, disguised as frumpy, mild-mannered Karen, absolutely kills at karaoke doing songs by…Jewel. Love it!

Good food for a good cause

I hope you’re hungry, North Jersey. Today, Wednesday July 14, 2010, Blue Moon Mexican Cafe of Englewood is hosting a fundraiser for the Englewood Public Library. In order for the library to benefit from your excellent taste in restaurants, you must present the following flyer. It’s good for the entire day, and for eat-in, delivery, or carryout orders. Help the library!

Here’s a link to the flyer by itself, without any text from this post.

Update: Future Husband Isaiah Mustafa, AKA the Old Spice Guy, says a few words about libraries: