Mistakes were made

I know that I put a facetious, Nixon-inspired title on this post, but I’m actually encouraged by the fact that President Bush can express regrets for negative things that happened during his tenure. He didn’t want to speculate on whether he would still have gone into Iraq if it had been known that the WMD rumors were untrue, but I actually respect that. I feel that regrets and second-guessing really never help at all, and can actually obscure the path that should be taken in the present. Anyway, here’s the article.

Somebody’s maturing, but I can’t say who

A year and some change ago, when she was still heard from all the time, I might have expressed a conservative amount of glee at the fact that Ann Coulter has broken her jaw. Mean, I know, but I’ve never pretended to be that nice. But the thing is, Ann has either mellowed, or people have stopped reporting on her nastiness, or maybe I’m just growing up, but this news makes me feel bad for her. A broken jaw seems like a horrific injury, and I wouldn’t wish it on anybody.

Also, after hearing all the untrained, unfocused vitriolic craziness that was passed off as cogent political commentary during the election cycle, I actually missed Ann a bit. She can be horribly mean and play to people’s worst fears, but she does it with a kind of style. I think that people know by now that Ann Coulter loves being reported on in the media she pretends to abhor, and therefore tend to take even the nastiest things she says with a grain of salt because of it. Plus, she has been known to talk a bit of smack about Republicans too, while a lot of the new breed seem to find Republicans to be above the type of scrutiny they direct toward Democrats. Unlike other conservative and Republican commentators, Coulter never seems like a psycho ranter; lots of people, myself included, often doubt that she means a lot of the horrible things that she says. People have even questioned whether “Ann Coulter” isn’t the best bit of performance art since Andy Kaufman, as Ann-the-person seems infinitely more likable and sensible than Ann-the-commentator. Even to people who should know better, Ann Coulter often comes off as too reasonable to be as deluded as her words would have you think. Did anybody ever believe that about Sarah Palin? Not that I’ve heard. In fact, I feel it’s much more likely that Governor Palin has deep reserves of crazy that she hasn’t even drilled into yet.

So: Godspeed, Ann. I wish you the most painless and quick recovery possible, and look forward to the day when the sight of you opening your mouth once again annoys me.

Was that wrong? Should I not have done that?

Remember Stephen Lewis, the Murfreesboro Free Press columnist who thought it would be hilarious to rewrite the theme song to The Jeffersons with the Obamas in mind? Well, as the person who commented on my post mentioned, in addition to reworking songs and ridiculing the accents of naturalized Americans in his free time, Mr. Lewis spends his days as a principal of an elementary school. Oh goody, because he is exactly who I want overseeing the next generation! (Overseeing! See what I did there?)

It seems that, in addition to the apology published by the editor of the Free Press, Mr. Lewis emailed his own tepid apology to the parents of those children who attend his school.

Although my hobby as a columnist is not connected directly to my position as principal I should have known better than to attempt to find humor in a subject so sensitive to so many. With all of that being said, I truly apologize to those of you who were offended by my comments.

What an apology, huh? I’m guessing that the school board or whoever actually hired him told him to write that. It certainly doesn’t sound heartfelt. To me, it sounds a lot like, “I’m sorry you overly sensitive whiners can’t take a joke.” I still really cannot believe that anybody would be dumb enough to write that column, but especially somebody who works with diverse populations every day and knows about the standards to which educators are held. How could this have seemed like a good idea? It would have been a terrible thing just to forward to a few friends, so how much more boneheaded was it to submit it for publication in a newspaper? You have to wonder about some people.

For those people who were directed to this post because of its title, George said that in an episode of Seinfeld, a show I generally don’t care about at all, but which I find selectively quotable.

Lighten up, Francis.

My mom is understandably super happy about Obama’s win. It really shows her how far we as a nation have come. My mother grew up in segregated South Carolina. Only her youngest brother (last of my grandparents’ 10 surviving children), ever went to school with white children, and then I think only in the last few years of high school. So my mom doesn’t hate anybody, but still has comfort issues around white people. She doesn’t really hang out with any, and I think that, to her, my having so many white friends is a source of confusion, amusement, and perhaps a little bit of pride (she’s happy that I don’t have the same bad associations that she does).

So anyway, I received all of these really uplifting, corny, cheesy, vaguely messianic emails from her about Barack Obama going into the election, and the volume, corniness, cheesiness, and messianic undertones have all increased since his win. Just like everybody else on the Internet, I have seen Patrick Moberg‘s illustration pretty much everywhere since November 4.

And now you've seen it, too!

But by now we all know that too much saccharine sentiment in our diets can lead to an irony deficiency, so here are two covers that I prefer to a lot of things my mom has sent me (predictably, she hated them). They’re from the Chicago Reader. The Obama cover is the one they went with (for obvious reasons), but they had the McCain cover all ready just in case.

Stupid Internet, ruining everything

Stephen Lewis, a humor columnist at the Murfreesboro Post of Tennessee, wrote an opinion column yesterday that included a song about the Obamas move to Washington. As you may have guessed by its inclusion in this post, this song was not in the best of taste. Mr. Lewis chose to set his “Ode to President Obama” to the tune of “Movin’ On Up,” the theme song to 1970’s-era television show, The Jefferson. Wow, Stephen. That’s Klassy!

Here’s the first verse:
“Well we’re movin’ on up,
To Washington, D.C.
To a deee-luxe pimp pad,
Painted whiiiite.
Yeah we’re movin’ on up,
To the White House.
I’ll be jetting with P. Diddy cross the sky.

Let’s examine the stereotypes found just in those lines (nevermind the rest of the song): We’ve got the missing “g” in “movin,'” because when you’re a black, Harvard-educated lawyer planning at least a 4 year squat in the White House, the last thing you’re thinking about is saying your words properly. Then we’ve got “pimp pad” (I’ll excuse “deee-luxe,” as it is in the original song). Because every black man aspires to being a peddler of women. And of course, what’s the point of being famous and black if you can’t hang out with P. Diddy? Nothing says you’ve reached the zenith of the American political establishment more than hanging out with Sean Combs.

Because newspaper articles on the Internet has the opportunity to reach readers around the world, Mr. Lewis’ stupidity did not stay limited to the Volunteer State. By Monday morning, this article, which initially appeared in the Sunday edition of the Post, was making the rounds on the Internet, offending latte-drinking, arugula-eating leftists and beer-swilling, gun-toting rightists alike. By Monday afternoon, the editor of the Murfeesboro Post, Michael L. Pirtle, had issued something resembling an apology. Here’s a link to Mr. Lewis’s column, with the editor’s note of the usual passive-aggressive sort apologizing “for any offense generated” by this column.

But does he have the big Mo?

So North Carolina has been called for Barack Obama, too, meaning that Missouri is the only remaining unclaimed state. The Associated Press, via the Boston Globe, announced this with a bit of a flourish.

For those of you who can’t be arsed to click the above link, the final paragraph in the article reads as follows:

So Obama has not just redrawn the map. He’s printed an entirely new one.

Pretty sentiment, if not particularly objective or news-like.

Senate news

We know what happened in the presidential election, but what happened in some of the other races I’ve been following?

First we’ll start with the good news:
Elizabeth Dole, hate- and fear-monger extraordinaire, was defeated by her opponent, Kay Hagan! I’m proud of North Carolina not only for ousting Dole, but also for going for Barack Obama (maybe)!

Then we’ll go to the meh news:
Frank Lautenberg, 84-year-old incumbent Democrat Senator, easily kept his seat in New Jersey. This means that he will be 90 years old at the next election. That’s super freaking old. He’s done a good job, so I hope he keeps it up, but I don’t understand how so many people who could complain about a 74-year-old presidential candidate could in good conscience elect a senator who is a decade older.

Then the “aw crap, Minnesota” news:
Norm Coleman defeated Al Franken by just over 700 votes. I try not to hate on those who vote for third party candidates, but seriously Minnesota, wtf? If even one thousand of those chuckleheads had voted for Franken, this would be a whole different day in Minnesota. There’s going to be a recount, so maybe there’s some hope, but I’m not holding my breath, since they say that a definitive winner may not be declared until December!

Michele Bachmann, who famously suggested that the media should reinstate McCarthy-era investigations into the patriotism of politicians, easily kept her seat. There is no justice. While I would have preferred it if she lost, and lost big, I would have hoped that any victory of hers was hard fought. I hate the idea of someone this bilious feeling as though she should keep behaving in this way and saying the kind of insane things she usually says.

What the world is saying

Here are some international reactions to Barack Obama’s election as the 44th United States president:

• Argentina (in Spanish)
• Australia
• Brazil (in Portuguese)
• Canada
• China
• Costa Rica (in Spanish)
• France (in French)
• Egypt (in Arabic)
• Germany (in German)
• India
• Indonesia
• Israel
• Italy
• Japan
• Jordan (in Arabic)
• Mexico (in Spanish)
• Nigeria
• Russia
• South Africa
• South Korea
• United Arab Emirates
• United Kingdom

Hell yeah!

I didn’t want to play Jinxy Jane yesterday, but I’m glad that I can now, without reservation, say that Barack Obama is the president-elect of the United States! I was asked at the party I attended last night, with all possible apologies and courtesy for the question, what Obama’s win meant to me, a black woman. And I have to say, I’m not sure whether I am approaching this from a place of racial pride. I have a lot of things going on right now. For the first time, the presidential candidate who I voted for won. I would have been happy if the new president-to-be could simply speak English, and instead we got somebody who is a captivating speaker, capable of raising people to almost religious levels of fervor and devotion (I think that sometimes it’s overdone, but it probably isn’t his fault that he is so charismatic). Plus, it’s exciting to know that the country will be run by a young guy, one who is certainly at a very different place in his life than I am, but who hasn’t been alive in eight different decades.

I find it moving to watch really committed Obama fans from all walks of life expressing such jubilation at his win. Walking back to Port Authority last night from Murray Hill, I saw so many people who were practically vibrating with happiness. On 5th Avenue, in front of the expensive stores, people spontaneously raised cries of “Obama” and “Wooooo!” People were so happy, and even the cops were smiling! I didn’t see one place where there was even a hint of trouble or unease. Everybody was too joyful to cause any sort of problem. I watched white people, young and old, cry tears of joy over the election of a black president. I looked at Obama and thought, “In a little over three decades, that could be my nephew.” I don’t believe that this proves that anybody in American can be anything, but I believe it moves us closer to that point than we have ever before been.

Vote!

Hey, Americans! Get out and vote your conscience! Remember that there’s more going on today than voting for the next president of the USA. Make sure you know what other races are going on in your area, and if there are any law changes/Constitutional amendments/referendum questions you need to think about.

I voted at 6am and am now a little tired. I shall have to take a wee nap before work!